1
00:00:01,829 --> 00:00:01,829
████████████████████████████████

2
00:00:01,829 --> 00:00:02,705
Helga:
ARNOLD!

3
00:00:02,788 --> 00:00:04,289
(<i> barking )</i>

4
00:00:04,665 --> 00:00:06,625
HEY, ARNOLD!

5
00:00:10,713 --> 00:00:13,006
(<i> glass shatters )</i>

6
00:00:16,552 --> 00:00:17,511
(<i> girl shrieks )</i>

7
00:00:17,594 --> 00:00:20,389
Helga:
HEY, ARNOLD!

8
00:00:21,223 --> 00:00:23,517
ARNOLD!

9
00:00:24,309 --> 00:00:26,353
ARNOLD!

10
00:00:26,645 --> 00:00:29,523
ARNOLD!

11
00:00:29,606 --> 00:00:33,277
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

12
00:00:33,360 --> 00:00:35,821
and NICKELODEON]

13
00:00:37,322 --> 00:00:38,240
AR-NOLD!

14
00:00:39,616 --> 00:00:41,618
MOVE IT,
FOOTBALL HEAD!

15
00:00:41,702 --> 00:00:43,746
Kids:
HEY, ARNOLD!

16
00:00:54,882 --> 00:01:01,847
♪ OH, BURY ME NOT
ON THE LONE PRAIRIE ♪

17
00:01:01,930 --> 00:01:05,017
POOKIE, MUST YOU SING
AT THIS HOUR?

18
00:01:05,100 --> 00:01:06,560
THAT'S CALAMITY POOKIE
TO YOU, SLIM.

19
00:01:06,643 --> 00:01:09,480
GRAB A PLATE
AND GET IN LINE.

20
00:01:09,563 --> 00:01:12,024
(<i> muttering )
LUCKY SHE'S GOOD LOOKING...</i>

21
00:01:12,107 --> 00:01:12,983
GOOD MORNING.

22
00:01:13,066 --> 00:01:14,526
WHAT'S GOOD ABOUT IT?

23
00:01:14,610 --> 00:01:15,944
HERE YOU GO, GRAMPS.

24
00:01:16,028 --> 00:01:18,447
YOU GOT IT FOLDED OPEN.
I HATE THAT.

25
00:01:18,530 --> 00:01:20,365
STOP CALLING ME "GRAMPS."

26
00:01:20,449 --> 00:01:22,618
I'M NOT YOUR GRAMPS,
YOU TINY SHRIMP.

27
00:01:22,701 --> 00:01:24,787
TOUCHY, TOUCHY!

28
00:01:24,870 --> 00:01:25,788
EAT UP, SLIM.

29
00:01:25,871 --> 00:01:27,664
WE GOT 15 MILES OF COW TRAIL

30
00:01:27,748 --> 00:01:29,374
BEFORE WE STOP FOR WATER.

31
00:01:29,458 --> 00:01:31,001
I GOT NO APPETITE.

32
00:01:31,084 --> 00:01:33,003
I'LL TAKE THEM,
GRANDPA.

33
00:01:33,086 --> 00:01:35,297
GET YOUR PAWS
OFF MY PLATE.

34
00:01:35,380 --> 00:01:37,174
I SAID, "I GOT NO APPETITE"

35
00:01:37,257 --> 00:01:39,551
NOT "HELP YOURSELF," YOU WEASEL.

36
00:01:39,635 --> 00:01:41,678
BOY, THE OLD MAN
IS CRANKY TODAY.

37
00:01:41,762 --> 00:01:44,807
THE OLD MAN CAN BE CRANKY
IF HE WANTS.

38
00:01:44,890 --> 00:01:45,808
MIND YOUR BUSINESS.

39
00:01:45,891 --> 00:01:47,059
WHO ASKED YOU, HYUNH?

40
00:01:47,142 --> 00:01:48,519
LOOK, IF THE OLD MAN...

41
00:01:48,602 --> 00:01:50,187
AH, QUIET,
ALL OF YOU.

42
00:01:50,270 --> 00:01:52,397
AND STOP CALLING ME "OLD MAN."

43
00:01:52,481 --> 00:01:53,982
I'M NOT YOUR OLD MAN!

44
00:01:54,066 --> 00:01:56,819
IF ANYBODY NEEDS ME,
I'LL BE IN MY OFFICE

45
00:01:56,902 --> 00:01:59,279
LOOKING THROUGH
MY OLD PHOTO ALBUMS

46
00:01:59,363 --> 00:02:03,408
REMEMBERING TIMES LONG PAST,
AND GETTING DEPRESSED.

47
00:02:03,492 --> 00:02:05,369
DON'T TOUCH THEM PANCAKES!

48
00:02:05,452 --> 00:02:07,162
WHAT'S WRONG
WITH GRANDPA?

49
00:02:07,246 --> 00:02:09,581
IT'S ALMOST HIS BIRTHDAY,
ARNOLD.

50
00:02:09,665 --> 00:02:12,251
HE DIDN'T ACT LIKE THIS
LAST YEAR.

51
00:02:12,334 --> 00:02:15,003
YES, BUT THIS IS A BIG YEAR
FOR PHIL.

52
00:02:15,087 --> 00:02:17,589
HE'LL BE 81, YOU KNOW.

53
00:02:18,674 --> 00:02:19,550
GRANDPA?

54
00:02:19,633 --> 00:02:20,384
THE DOOR'S OPEN.

55
00:02:20,467 --> 00:02:22,594
WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL
ABOUT TURNING 81?

56
00:02:22,678 --> 00:02:25,389
THE FAMILY CURSE, ARNOLD.

57
00:02:25,472 --> 00:02:25,889
FAMILY CURSE?

58
00:02:25,973 --> 00:02:27,683
NO ONE IN MY LINE'S

59
00:02:27,766 --> 00:02:29,476
EVER LIVED PAST 81, ARNOLD.

60
00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:30,018
NO ONE!

61
00:02:30,102 --> 00:02:31,770
SATURDAY'S MY BIRTHDAY

62
00:02:31,854 --> 00:02:34,857
AND THEN I BUY THE FARM.

63
00:02:34,940 --> 00:02:36,149
WE'RE BUYING A FARM?

64
00:02:36,233 --> 00:02:38,110
NO, IT'S AN EXPRESSION,
YOU KNOW

65
00:02:38,193 --> 00:02:40,028
CLOSE UP SHOP, TAKE A DIRT NAP

66
00:02:40,112 --> 00:02:41,613
WAKE UP TO THE BIG SLEEP.

67
00:02:41,697 --> 00:02:43,824
IT'S CURTAINS FOR ME, BOY.

68
00:02:43,907 --> 00:02:46,410
IT'S ALL OVER BUT THE CRYING.

69
00:02:46,493 --> 00:02:49,204
I'M TALKING ABOUT
LARGER FORCES HERE.

70
00:02:49,288 --> 00:02:50,330
THINGS BEYOND
OUR CONTROL.

71
00:02:50,414 --> 00:02:55,294
I'M TALKING ABOUT THE MAJESTIC
CLOCKWORKS OF THE UNIVERSE.

72
00:02:55,377 --> 00:02:58,005
YOU'RE AS HEALTHY
AS YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN.

73
00:02:58,088 --> 00:02:58,839
IT'S MY DESTINY
CALLING.

74
00:02:58,922 --> 00:03:01,425
I'VE JUST GOT
TO ACCEPT IT.

75
00:03:01,508 --> 00:03:03,635
THE ONLY WAY TO PROVE
YOU'RE WRONG

76
00:03:03,719 --> 00:03:05,262
IS TO GET A CHECK-UP.

77
00:03:05,345 --> 00:03:06,680
A CHECK-UP? OH, NO.

78
00:03:06,763 --> 00:03:09,558
I HAVEN'T BEEN INSIDE
A DOCTOR'S OFFICE

79
00:03:09,641 --> 00:03:10,183
IN 25 YEARS

80
00:03:10,267 --> 00:03:12,853
AND I DON'T INTEND
TO GO NOW

81
00:03:12,936 --> 00:03:14,271
LET ME TELL YOU.

82
00:03:14,354 --> 00:03:16,189
AAH!

83
00:03:16,273 --> 00:03:17,649
GOOD, GOOD.

84
00:03:17,733 --> 00:03:18,692
NOW COUGH.

85
00:03:18,775 --> 00:03:20,277
GEEZ, YOU'RE A PEST.

86
00:03:20,360 --> 00:03:22,112
WHY'D I EVER AGREE TO THIS?

87
00:03:22,195 --> 00:03:24,448
TO PROVE YOU'RE HEALTHY,
GRANDPA.

88
00:03:24,531 --> 00:03:26,617
HOW MANY TIMES DO I
HAVE TO TELL YOU?

89
00:03:26,700 --> 00:03:28,785
I'M NOT HEALTHY

90
00:03:28,869 --> 00:03:31,246
I'M HANGING ON BY A THREAD.

91
00:03:31,330 --> 00:03:34,291
I'M KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCKING
ON HEAVEN'S DOOR.

92
00:03:34,374 --> 00:03:37,920
I'M GOING TO CROAK ON MY 81st
BIRTHDAY, SATURDAY.

93
00:03:38,003 --> 00:03:41,131
WHAT DO YOU THINK,
DR. STEIGLITZ?

94
00:03:41,214 --> 00:03:43,759
IN MY 81 YEARS OF PRACTICE

95
00:03:43,842 --> 00:03:46,803
I HAVE NEVER SEEN
A HEALTHIER MAN HIS AGE.

96
00:03:46,887 --> 00:03:49,056
WHY ARE YOU WHISPERING?

97
00:03:49,139 --> 00:03:51,558
I'M OLD ENOUGH TO HANDLE
THE BAD NEWS.

98
00:03:51,642 --> 00:03:52,309
GO AHEAD AND SPILL IT.

99
00:03:52,392 --> 00:03:54,978
YOU'RE AS STRONG
AS AN OX, PHIL.

100
00:03:55,062 --> 00:03:55,979
YOU COULD LIVE

101
00:03:56,063 --> 00:03:59,399
TO BE 150 AT THE RATE
YOU'RE GOING.

102
00:03:59,483 --> 00:04:00,984
DON'T SUGARCOAT IT, DOC.

103
00:04:01,068 --> 00:04:02,653
I'M FINISHED, AREN'T I?

104
00:04:02,736 --> 00:04:05,614
THAT'S NOT WHAT
I SAID AT ALL.

105
00:04:05,697 --> 00:04:08,617
YEP! MIGHT AS WELL
PUT ON MY FUNERAL SUIT

106
00:04:08,700 --> 00:04:12,621
TAKE TO MY ROCKING CHAIR
AND WAIT FOR THE GRIM REAPER.

107
00:04:12,704 --> 00:04:13,622
BUT, GRANDPA...

108
00:04:13,705 --> 00:04:14,539
BUT NOTHING!

109
00:04:16,959 --> 00:04:19,670
<i>WELL, NOW THAT I'M A GONER</i>

110
00:04:19,753 --> 00:04:22,547
IT'S TIME TO GIVE AWAY
ALL MY EARTHLY GOODS.

111
00:04:22,631 --> 00:04:24,883
AND, AS MY ONLY BEGOTTEN
GRANDSON

112
00:04:24,967 --> 00:04:29,346
I WANT YOU TO HAVE MY MOST
PRIZED POSSESSION, THE PACKARD.

113
00:04:29,429 --> 00:04:31,348
BUT WHAT WOULD I
DO WITH A CAR?

114
00:04:31,431 --> 00:04:33,517
WHY DON'T YOU LEAVE IT
TO GRANDMA?

115
00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:34,184
ARE YOU CRAZY, BOY?

116
00:04:34,268 --> 00:04:36,853
WOULD YOU TRUST YOUR GRANDMA

117
00:04:36,937 --> 00:04:38,021
BEHIND THE WHEEL OF A CAR?

118
00:04:38,105 --> 00:04:41,525
♪ OH, HE DIED IN THE SADDLE ♪

119
00:04:41,608 --> 00:04:44,444
♪ HE WENT AND BOUGHT THE FARM ♪

120
00:04:44,528 --> 00:04:47,030
♪ AND THEN WE
TANNED HIS OLD HIDE ♪

121
00:04:47,114 --> 00:04:49,783
♪ AND NAILED IT TO THE BARN. ♪

122
00:04:51,451 --> 00:04:54,705
SO, I'M LEAVING
YOU THE PACKARD, OKAY?

123
00:04:54,788 --> 00:04:55,497
HOWDY, SLIM.

124
00:04:55,580 --> 00:04:58,375
ABOUT TIME FOR
THE LAST ROUNDUP, HUH?

125
00:04:58,458 --> 00:04:59,710
THAT'S RIGHT, POOKIE.

126
00:04:59,793 --> 00:05:02,004
IN FACT, ARNOLD AND I
WERE JUST GOING

127
00:05:02,087 --> 00:05:04,214
OVER MY LAST WILL
AND TESTAMENT.

128
00:05:04,297 --> 00:05:05,882
BESIDES THE BOARDING HOUSE

129
00:05:05,966 --> 00:05:06,883
IS THERE ANYTHING
YOU WANT?

130
00:05:06,967 --> 00:05:09,469
SHUCKS, SLIM, I JUST NEED

131
00:05:09,553 --> 00:05:11,555
THE LONESOME TRAIL AHEAD OF ME

132
00:05:11,638 --> 00:05:13,265
THE PRAIRIE WIND AT MY BACK

133
00:05:13,348 --> 00:05:14,725
AND THE MOURNFUL WAIL

134
00:05:14,808 --> 00:05:16,727
OF THE COYOTES
ON A MOONLIT NIGHT.

135
00:05:16,810 --> 00:05:20,147
BUT I'LL MISS YOU, SLIM.

136
00:05:20,230 --> 00:05:26,611
♪ OH, BURY ME NOT
ON THE LONE PRAIRIE... ♪

137
00:05:26,695 --> 00:05:28,155
I HAVE TO DECIDE
WHICH BOARDER GETS

138
00:05:28,238 --> 00:05:30,782
MY MATCHING SET
OF CROQUET MALLETS.

139
00:05:30,866 --> 00:05:33,285
I'LL TAKE THEM, GRANDPA.

140
00:05:33,368 --> 00:05:35,203
OVER MY DEAD BODY, KOKOSHKA.

141
00:05:35,287 --> 00:05:38,832
YOU'RE NOT GETTING
A SINGLE ONE. NOW BEAT IT!

142
00:05:38,915 --> 00:05:40,417
WHERE WERE WE, ARNOLD?

143
00:05:40,500 --> 00:05:41,585
I'M OLD AND FEEBLE

144
00:05:41,668 --> 00:05:44,046
AND CAN'T REMEMBER
WHAT I WAS SAYING.

145
00:05:44,129 --> 00:05:44,880
SUMMING UP YOUR LIFE...

146
00:05:44,963 --> 00:05:47,674
OH, YES, THE FAMILY CURSE.

147
00:05:47,758 --> 00:05:51,261
WELL, SHORT MAN, IT'S BEEN
A LONG, RICH AND HAPPY LIFE.

148
00:05:51,344 --> 00:05:55,724
BUT NOW IT'S NEARLY TIME
TO JOIN THE CHOIR INVISIBLE.

149
00:05:55,807 --> 00:05:58,769
YES, I'VE HAD MANY
WONDERFUL EXPERIENCES.

150
00:05:58,852 --> 00:06:01,938
I'VE WATCHED OUR HOME
TEAM WIN THE PENNANT.

151
00:06:02,022 --> 00:06:04,483
I'VE SAT THROUGH
DOUBLE FEATURES AT THE KISKA.

152
00:06:04,566 --> 00:06:09,488
I'VE TASTED THE CORN DOGS
DOWN AT THE RIVER'S DOCK.

153
00:06:09,571 --> 00:06:12,074
NOW, IN THE TWILIGHT
OF MY FINAL DAYS

154
00:06:12,157 --> 00:06:13,950
THERE'S NOTHING LEFT
TO DO

155
00:06:14,034 --> 00:06:17,329
BUT SIT HERE IN MY ROCKER
AND WAIT FOR THE END.

156
00:06:17,412 --> 00:06:18,288
(<i> sighs )</i>

157
00:06:18,371 --> 00:06:19,414
(<i> rocker creaking )</i>

158
00:06:21,917 --> 00:06:23,126
FAMILY CURSE, HUH?

159
00:06:23,210 --> 00:06:25,045
IT DOESN'T MAKE
SENSE, ARNOLD.

160
00:06:25,128 --> 00:06:27,130
YOUR GRANDPA'S IN GREAT SHAPE.

161
00:06:27,214 --> 00:06:29,800
HE BENCH-PRESSED 210 POUNDS.

162
00:06:29,883 --> 00:06:31,510
PRETTY GOOD FOR AN OLD GUY.

163
00:06:31,593 --> 00:06:34,096
THIS WHOLE FAMILY CURSE THING
IS CRAZY.

164
00:06:34,179 --> 00:06:36,765
I DON'T THINK GRANDPA
REALLY BELIEVES IN IT.

165
00:06:36,848 --> 00:06:37,390
MAYBE, I MEAN

166
00:06:37,474 --> 00:06:39,559
JUST MAYBE NOW,
HE COULD BE

167
00:06:39,643 --> 00:06:41,686
DOING THIS TO
GET YOUR ATTENTION.

168
00:06:41,770 --> 00:06:43,021
MAYBE IF I
GET HIM AWAY

169
00:06:43,105 --> 00:06:44,648
FROM THE BOARDING HOUSE

170
00:06:44,731 --> 00:06:45,899
HE'D FORGET ALL ABOUT
THIS CURSE.

171
00:06:45,982 --> 00:06:48,151
TAKE HIM
TO A BALL GAME.

172
00:06:48,235 --> 00:06:48,235
ICE SKATING.

173
00:06:48,235 --> 00:06:49,736
THE MOVIES.

174
00:06:49,820 --> 00:06:51,822
I THINK THIS JUST MIGHT WORK.

175
00:06:51,905 --> 00:06:53,115
SEE YOU, GERALD.

176
00:06:54,908 --> 00:06:57,410
OSKAR, ERNIE

177
00:06:57,494 --> 00:07:00,956
MR. HYUNH AND ALL MY FRIENDS.

178
00:07:01,039 --> 00:07:01,832
IT'S FRIDAY.

179
00:07:01,915 --> 00:07:03,583
MY LAST DAY ON EARTH.

180
00:07:03,667 --> 00:07:06,837
THE REASON I ASKED YOU
ALL HERE IS, WELL

181
00:07:06,920 --> 00:07:09,673
I'VE THOUGHT LONG
AND HARD ABOUT IT

182
00:07:09,756 --> 00:07:11,007
AND I'VE DECIDED

183
00:07:11,091 --> 00:07:13,969
THAT I'M LEAVING
EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU...

184
00:07:14,052 --> 00:07:16,721
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!

185
00:07:16,805 --> 00:07:19,850
NOW SCRAM, ALL OF YOU.
VAMOOSE!

186
00:07:19,933 --> 00:07:21,643
HE DIDN'T LEAVE
ME ANYTHING.

187
00:07:21,726 --> 00:07:23,145
THIS GUY
IS REALLY CHEAP.

188
00:07:23,228 --> 00:07:24,104
GRANDPA, HOW ARE
YOU DOING?

189
00:07:24,187 --> 00:07:27,524
OH, I'M TIRED,
AND MY BONES ACHE

190
00:07:27,607 --> 00:07:30,527
AND IT'S GETTING
ALL DARK, SHORT MAN.

191
00:07:30,610 --> 00:07:32,237
EVEN IF YOU BELIEVE
IN THE FAMILY CURSE

192
00:07:32,320 --> 00:07:34,739
AND THINK YOUR LIFE
IS GOING TO END...

193
00:07:34,823 --> 00:07:35,824
MIDNIGHT TONIGHT.

194
00:07:35,907 --> 00:07:36,992
SHOULDN'T YOU SPEND

195
00:07:37,075 --> 00:07:39,411
YOUR LAST DAY HAVING FUN?

196
00:07:39,494 --> 00:07:41,496
OOH, BUT ARNOLD, I'M OLD, AND...

197
00:07:41,580 --> 00:07:44,040
WE COULD DO ALL THE THINGS
YOU LOVE--

198
00:07:44,124 --> 00:07:46,168
GO TO A BALL GAME,
GO ICE SKATING.

199
00:07:46,251 --> 00:07:48,879
PLEASE, GRANDPA.
ONE LAST TIME, FOR ME?

200
00:07:48,962 --> 00:07:52,090
ALL RIGHT, IF IT'LL
MAKE YOU HAPPY.

201
00:08:23,830 --> 00:08:25,790
WELL, ARNOLD.
I HAVEN'T ENJOYED

202
00:08:25,874 --> 00:08:30,337
A CORN DOG THIS MUCH
SINCE I WAS A LAD.

203
00:08:30,420 --> 00:08:32,547
I KNOW.
THESE ARE GREAT.

204
00:08:32,631 --> 00:08:34,090
HOW ABOUT THAT SUNSET?

205
00:08:34,174 --> 00:08:37,135
IT'S BEEN THE NICEST AFTERNOON
I'VE HAD IN AGES.

206
00:08:37,219 --> 00:08:39,596
THANKS A LOT,
SHORT MAN.

207
00:08:39,679 --> 00:08:43,600
WE COULD DO THIS KIND OF THING
EVERY DAY, FROM NOW ON.

208
00:08:43,683 --> 00:08:45,101
DON'T YOU THINK, GRANDPA?

209
00:08:45,185 --> 00:08:48,063
OH, YEAH,
SURE WE COULD.

210
00:08:48,146 --> 00:08:49,731
OH, EXCEPT FOR ONE THING.

211
00:08:49,814 --> 00:08:51,358
I'M CROAKING AT THE
STROKE OF MIDNIGHT!

212
00:08:51,441 --> 00:08:53,944
KIND OF PUTS A DAMPER
ON YOUR LITTLE PLAN

213
00:08:54,027 --> 00:08:55,445
DOESN'T IT,
SHORT MAN?

214
00:08:55,528 --> 00:08:58,240
WE'D BETTER GET BACK
TO THE BOARDING HOUSE

215
00:08:58,323 --> 00:09:01,159
SO I CAN SAY GOOD-BYE
TO POOKIE.

216
00:09:01,243 --> 00:09:02,244
(<i> thunder )</i>

217
00:09:02,327 --> 00:09:03,870
(<i> funereal organ music playing )</i>

218
00:09:03,954 --> 00:09:06,581
AH, GRAMPS.

219
00:09:06,665 --> 00:09:07,916
(<i> thunder )</i>

220
00:09:07,999 --> 00:09:10,961
HE WAS SO GOOD.

221
00:09:11,044 --> 00:09:13,088
(<i> sniffling )</i>

222
00:09:13,171 --> 00:09:16,800
WELL, THE END DRAWS
NEAR, SHORT MAN.

223
00:09:16,883 --> 00:09:17,217
GRANDPA.

224
00:09:17,300 --> 00:09:19,261
NOW, NOW, ARNOLD.

225
00:09:19,344 --> 00:09:22,222
WE'VE ALL GOT TO FACE
THE MUSIC SOMETIME.

226
00:09:22,305 --> 00:09:23,181
UNFORTUNATELY

227
00:09:23,265 --> 00:09:25,892
I HAVE TO FACE
<i>THIS MUSIC.</i>

228
00:09:25,976 --> 00:09:29,020
SO, SIT HERE BY ME,
AND KEEP ME COMPANY

229
00:09:29,104 --> 00:09:30,272
IN MY FINAL
MINUTES OF LIFE.

230
00:09:30,355 --> 00:09:32,107
DID GRANDPA BUY
THE FARM YET?

231
00:09:32,190 --> 00:09:35,026
NO, BUT IF HE
KICKS THE BUCKET

232
00:09:35,110 --> 00:09:36,111
IN TWO MINUTES,
I WIN THE POOL.

233
00:09:36,194 --> 00:09:38,822
THIS IS RIDICULOUS.

234
00:09:38,905 --> 00:09:40,240
THERE IS NO FAMILY CURSE.

235
00:09:40,323 --> 00:09:51,793
(<i> clock striking midnight )</i>

236
00:09:55,130 --> 00:09:57,507
I'M SORRY, ARNOLD.

237
00:09:57,590 --> 00:09:59,050
BUT IT'S TIME FOR ME TO GO.

238
00:09:59,134 --> 00:10:01,928
(<i> wind whistles )</i>

239
00:10:02,012 --> 00:10:03,930
(<i> Grandpa groans )</i>

240
00:10:07,058 --> 00:10:09,853
IS THE OLD MAN...?

241
00:10:09,936 --> 00:10:11,855
YES, HE FINISHED.

242
00:10:11,938 --> 00:10:13,189
HOORAY!
I WIN THE POOL.

243
00:10:13,273 --> 00:10:14,190
(<i> laughs )</i>

244
00:10:14,274 --> 00:10:16,234
WELL, THAT'S IT.

245
00:10:16,318 --> 00:10:18,945
I MUST BE IN HEAVEN.

246
00:10:19,988 --> 00:10:22,198
WAIT A MINUTE.

247
00:10:22,282 --> 00:10:24,367
OH, NO!
OSKAR'S HERE.

248
00:10:24,451 --> 00:10:26,202
THIS MUST BE
THE OTHER PLACE.

249
00:10:26,286 --> 00:10:27,162
NO, GRANDPA.

250
00:10:27,245 --> 00:10:27,996
IT'S THE
BOARDING HOUSE.

251
00:10:28,079 --> 00:10:30,290
YOU'RE STILL HERE.

252
00:10:30,373 --> 00:10:32,876
OH, YES. WELL, IT'S
STILL MY TIME TO GO.

253
00:10:32,959 --> 00:10:35,211
JUST LIKE MY
GRANDFATHER BEFORE ME.

254
00:10:35,295 --> 00:10:38,214
BORN IN 1830, DIED IN 1921.

255
00:10:38,298 --> 00:10:39,841
AND HIS FATHER

256
00:10:39,924 --> 00:10:45,430
BORN IN 1800,
DIED IN 1891.

257
00:10:45,513 --> 00:10:50,060
GRANDPA, THAT MEANS THEY
WERE BOTH<i> 91 WHEN THEY DIED.</i>

258
00:10:50,143 --> 00:10:52,062
(<i> muttering, counting )</i>

259
00:10:52,145 --> 00:10:54,481
OH, I'M AN IDIOT!

260
00:10:54,564 --> 00:10:55,648
THAT'S RIGHT.

261
00:10:55,732 --> 00:11:00,111
THE FAMILY CURSE
IS 91, NOT 81.

262
00:11:00,195 --> 00:11:03,406
THAT MEANS I HAVE
TEN MORE YEARS
BEFORE I'M WORM CHOW.

263
00:11:03,490 --> 00:11:06,701
I'M NOT GOING TO DIE!

264
00:11:06,785 --> 00:11:08,662
AT LEAST NOT NOW.

265
00:11:08,745 --> 00:11:10,080
(<i> playing Sousa march )</i>

266
00:11:10,163 --> 00:11:13,041
♪ THREE CHEERS
FOR THE RED, WHITE AND BLUE ♪

267
00:11:13,124 --> 00:11:14,250
WHOO!
♪ DA-DA DUM, DA-DA DEE ♪

268
00:11:14,334 --> 00:11:16,544
♪ DA-DA DEE, DEE... ♪

269
00:11:16,628 --> 00:11:18,088
OH-HA!
♪ DEE DEE DEE... ♪

270
00:11:18,171 --> 00:11:19,255
OH, GREAT.

271
00:11:19,339 --> 00:11:21,758
NOW I LOSE THE POOL.

272
00:11:21,841 --> 00:11:22,926
YOU SEE, YOU SEE?

273
00:11:23,009 --> 00:11:24,719
I ALL DRESS UP,
AND NOTHING!

274
00:11:26,346 --> 00:11:28,848
THIS CALLS FOR A
CELEBRATION, SHORT MAN.

275
00:11:28,932 --> 00:11:29,766
LET'S GO OUT
FOR ICE CREAM.

276
00:11:29,849 --> 00:11:33,061
I'M NOT SURE THAT'S
A GOOD IDEA, GRANDPA.

277
00:11:33,144 --> 00:11:34,437
YOU'RE 81 YEARS OLD.

278
00:11:34,521 --> 00:11:36,189
WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?

279
00:11:36,272 --> 00:11:38,858
YOU HEARD THE DOCTOR,
I'M QUITE A SPECIMEN.

280
00:11:38,942 --> 00:11:39,484
I'M STRONG AS AN OX.

281
00:11:39,567 --> 00:11:41,986
NOW LET'S GO GET ICE CREAM.

282
00:11:42,070 --> 00:11:45,407
SAY, I WONDER IF WE CAN GET
A CORN DOG AT THIS HOUR?

283
00:11:45,490 --> 00:11:46,825
LET'S TAKE IN A COUPLE
OF MOVIES...

284
00:11:52,455 --> 00:11:56,292
(<i> bell rings )</i>

285
00:11:59,212 --> 00:12:00,255
HELGA, AREN'T YOU GOING

286
00:12:00,338 --> 00:12:02,966
TO MAKE
A MOTHER'S DAY CARD?

287
00:12:03,049 --> 00:12:04,134
I ALREADY MADE IT.

288
00:12:05,218 --> 00:12:06,970
IT'S RATHER PLAIN, ISN'T IT?

289
00:12:07,053 --> 00:12:09,347
IN CASE
YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED, PHOEBE

290
00:12:09,431 --> 00:12:12,809
MIRIAM ISN'T EXACTLY
WORLD'S GREATEST MOM MATERIAL.

291
00:12:12,892 --> 00:12:14,394
WELL, I UNDERSTAND,
BUT...

292
00:12:14,477 --> 00:12:17,647
WHAT KIND OF MOTHER PACKS LUNCH
WITH PLASTIC SILVERWARE

293
00:12:17,730 --> 00:12:19,482
TOWELETTES, AND NO SANDWICH?

294
00:12:19,566 --> 00:12:23,153
OR TAKES IMPROMPTU NAPS BEHIND
THE SOFA WHILE I'M STARVING?

295
00:12:23,236 --> 00:12:26,990
OR CONSTANTLY FORGETS TO PICK ME
UP FROM SOCCER PRACTICE?!

296
00:12:27,073 --> 00:12:28,658
WELL, NO ONE'S
PERFECT.

297
00:12:28,741 --> 00:12:30,577
YEAH, ESPECIALLY MIRIAM.

298
00:12:30,660 --> 00:12:33,705
SURE, I'D LIKE
TO HAVE A MOM THAT
DID GREAT THINGS

299
00:12:33,788 --> 00:12:35,999
OR EVEN JUST DID THE THINGS
SHE SAID SHE WOULD.

300
00:12:36,082 --> 00:12:39,878
I'D<i> LOVE TO HAVE A MOM
THAT WASN'T ALWAYS MESSING UP</i>

301
00:12:39,961 --> 00:12:41,004
AND MAKING MISTAKES...
BUT I DON'T.

302
00:12:41,087 --> 00:12:43,006
I'VE GOT MIRIAM.

303
00:12:43,089 --> 00:12:44,757
SO I GUESS
YOU'RE NOT DOING

304
00:12:44,841 --> 00:12:45,842
ANYTHING SPECIAL
THIS WEEKEND?

305
00:12:45,925 --> 00:12:49,637
WELL, NOT LIKE
IT'S ANY BUSINESS
OF YOURS, ARNOLDO

306
00:12:49,721 --> 00:12:51,347
BUT ME, MOM AND DAD
ARE SUPPOSED TO VISIT

307
00:12:51,431 --> 00:12:54,017
MY GRANDMA
IN SOUTH DAKOTA.

308
00:12:54,100 --> 00:12:54,851
SOUNDS LIKE FUN.

309
00:12:54,934 --> 00:12:56,352
I'D RATHER HAVE ROOT CANAL.

310
00:12:56,436 --> 00:12:57,395
YOU SHOULD GIVE
YOUR MOM A CHANCE.

311
00:12:57,479 --> 00:13:00,815
HAVE A LITTLE FAITH
IN PEOPLE.

312
00:13:00,899 --> 00:13:02,358
(<i> telephone rings )</i>

313
00:13:02,442 --> 00:13:03,610
<i>BIG BOB HERE.</i>

314
00:13:03,693 --> 00:13:04,736
UH-HUH. YEAH.

315
00:13:04,819 --> 00:13:06,446
OH, HECK, YEAH, I CAN MAKE IT.

316
00:13:06,529 --> 00:13:08,948
WAKE UP. GOT A
LITTLE CHANGE OF PLANS.

317
00:13:09,032 --> 00:13:11,075
THERE'S A BIG CLIENT
DOWN IN DALLAS

318
00:13:11,159 --> 00:13:13,453
WANTS TO BUY
A WHOLE MESS OF BEEPERS.

319
00:13:13,536 --> 00:13:13,536
BUT, THEN...

320
00:13:13,536 --> 00:13:14,704
I'M ON MY WAY
TO THE AIRPORT.

321
00:13:14,704 --> 00:13:14,704
BUT, THEN...

322
00:13:14,704 --> 00:13:15,788
I'M ON MY WAY
TO THE AIRPORT.

323
00:13:15,872 --> 00:13:17,123
THAT'S RIGHT, MIRIAM.

324
00:13:17,207 --> 00:13:19,292
JUST YOU AND HELGA
DRIVING TO SOUTH DAKOTA.

325
00:13:19,375 --> 00:13:20,585
YOU'RE KIDDING, RIGHT?

326
00:13:20,668 --> 00:13:22,170
IT'S OKAY, HELGA,
IT'LL BE FUN.

327
00:13:22,253 --> 00:13:24,130
WE NEVER GET

328
00:13:24,214 --> 00:13:25,882
TO SPEND
TIME TOGETHER.

329
00:13:25,965 --> 00:13:26,382
WHAT DO YOU SAY?

330
00:13:26,466 --> 00:13:29,177
(<i> horn honking )</i>

331
00:13:29,260 --> 00:13:30,845
YOU ARE JOKING,
RIGHT, DAD?

332
00:13:30,929 --> 00:13:32,931
MIRIAM AND ME ALONE
ON THE ROAD?

333
00:13:33,014 --> 00:13:34,641
PLEASE TELL ME YOU'RE JOKING.

334
00:13:34,724 --> 00:13:35,558
PLEASE.

335
00:13:35,642 --> 00:13:36,893
(<i> tires squealing )</i>

336
00:13:38,895 --> 00:13:41,147
HOW ARE THINGS GOING
AT SCHOOL, HELGA?

337
00:13:41,231 --> 00:13:41,898
GOOD.

338
00:13:41,981 --> 00:13:42,899
GOOD.

339
00:13:42,982 --> 00:13:44,692
HOW ARE THINGS...

340
00:13:44,776 --> 00:13:46,402
AROUND THE HOUSE?

341
00:13:46,486 --> 00:13:48,446
OH, TERRIFIC.

342
00:13:48,530 --> 00:13:49,614
YEAH.

343
00:13:49,697 --> 00:13:51,241
HOW'S YOUR LITTLE FRIEND

344
00:13:51,324 --> 00:13:51,324
██

345
00:13:51,324 --> 00:13:52,408
UM, UH... PHOEBE?

346
00:13:52,492 --> 00:13:54,410
SHE'S STILL YOUR BEST FRIEND?

347
00:13:54,494 --> 00:13:56,287
YUP, STILL MY BEST FRIEND.

348
00:13:56,371 --> 00:13:58,998
WELL, NOW THAT
WE'RE ALL CAUGHT UP

349
00:13:59,082 --> 00:14:00,792
MIND IF I TURN ON
THE RADIO?

350
00:14:00,875 --> 00:14:01,626
OKAY, SURE, YEAH.

351
00:14:02,835 --> 00:14:08,550
(<i> staticky heavy metal music
playing... )</i>

352
00:14:08,633 --> 00:14:11,678
(<i> shouting above music ):
DO YOU MIND</i>

353
00:14:11,761 --> 00:14:14,305
IF WE LISTEN TO
SOME OTHER MUSIC?

354
00:14:14,389 --> 00:14:15,932
(<i> yells ):
WHAT?</i>

355
00:14:16,015 --> 00:14:18,476
I SAY, DO YOU MIND

356
00:14:18,560 --> 00:14:20,353
IF WE LISTEN
TO SOME OTHER...

357
00:14:20,436 --> 00:14:20,937
(<i> turns down volume )</i>

358
00:14:21,020 --> 00:14:22,355
(<i> normally ):
MUSIC?</i>

359
00:14:22,438 --> 00:14:24,482
(<i> sighs ) FINE.</i>

360
00:14:25,024 --> 00:14:25,775
(<i> jumble of stations )</i>

361
00:14:25,858 --> 00:14:30,530
OH, I HAVEN'T HEARD
THIS SONG IN YEARS.

362
00:14:30,613 --> 00:14:33,324
A STROLL DOWN
MEMORY LANE, HUH?

363
00:14:33,408 --> 00:14:35,910
YES. OH, IT SURE IS.

364
00:14:35,994 --> 00:14:38,288
♪<i> OH, TOMORROW'S ALWAYS
JUST A DAY AWAY... ♪</i>

365
00:14:38,371 --> 00:14:40,582
AND THEN WHEN I WAS 15

366
00:14:40,665 --> 00:14:43,626
OH, IT WAS
THE SUMMER OF LOVE.

367
00:14:43,710 --> 00:14:45,670
MOM, I'M REALLY
HUNGRY.

368
00:14:45,753 --> 00:14:48,089
OH, LOOK! THE WHEELER INN

369
00:14:48,172 --> 00:14:50,675
AND A HERB'S
BIG GUY RESTAURANT

370
00:14:50,758 --> 00:14:52,719
WITH A KARAOKE LOUNGE!

371
00:14:52,802 --> 00:14:53,886
(<i> gasps )</i>

372
00:14:53,970 --> 00:14:56,973
KARAOKE, UH, NO, NO,
MOM, PLEASE, NO.

373
00:14:57,056 --> 00:14:57,056
I REALLY
DON'T THINK...

374
00:14:57,056 --> 00:14:59,934
(<i> horn blaring )</i>

375
00:15:01,144 --> 00:15:02,437
(<i> screeches to halt )</i>

376
00:15:02,520 --> 00:15:04,772
♪ WE GOT TOMORROW ♪

377
00:15:04,856 --> 00:15:07,191
♪ WHO NEEDS YESTERDAY? ♪

378
00:15:07,275 --> 00:15:11,070
♪ 'CAUSE, OH, TOMORROW'S
ALWAYS JUST A DAY AWAY... ♪

379
00:15:11,154 --> 00:15:12,322
YES, YES!

380
00:15:12,405 --> 00:15:13,823
HI, HELGA, HI, HONEY!

381
00:15:13,906 --> 00:15:16,701
PLEASE, JUST TAKE ME NOW.

382
00:15:16,784 --> 00:15:18,620
♪ ALWAYS JUST A DAY AWAY! ♪

383
00:15:18,703 --> 00:15:21,456
(<i> crickets chirping )</i>

384
00:15:21,539 --> 00:15:23,499
(<i> mumbling ):
♪ TOMORROW'S JUST... ♪</i>

385
00:15:23,583 --> 00:15:25,752
(<i> snoring... )</i>

386
00:15:31,591 --> 00:15:33,134
(<i> birds singing )</i>

387
00:15:33,217 --> 00:15:34,886
(<i> door bursting open )</i>

388
00:15:34,969 --> 00:15:35,678
(<i> crash )</i>

389
00:15:35,762 --> 00:15:38,181
OH, I SLEPT SO GOOD.

390
00:15:38,264 --> 00:15:39,390
I FEEL SO RESTED.

391
00:15:39,474 --> 00:15:41,434
DON'T YOU, HELGA?

392
00:15:41,517 --> 00:15:43,186
HERE, HOLD THIS.

393
00:15:44,479 --> 00:15:45,480
MIRIAM!

394
00:15:45,563 --> 00:15:46,606
OH, I'M SORRY, SWEETHEART.

395
00:15:46,689 --> 00:15:48,274
HERE, THAT'LL COME OUT.

396
00:15:48,358 --> 00:15:49,525
MOM, QUIT IT.

397
00:15:49,609 --> 00:15:51,527
JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!

398
00:15:51,611 --> 00:15:54,113
DON'T WORRY, HELGA.

399
00:15:54,197 --> 00:15:55,531
IT'S A BRAND-NEW

400
00:15:55,615 --> 00:15:56,991
BRIGHT SUNNY DAY.

401
00:15:57,075 --> 00:15:58,701
IT'S GOING
TO BE FINE.

402
00:15:58,785 --> 00:16:00,453
(<i> moaning )</i>

403
00:16:00,536 --> 00:16:02,789
YOU HAVE TO THINK
POSITIVE, HONEY.

404
00:16:02,872 --> 00:16:02,872
(<i> horn blaring )</i>

405
00:16:02,872 --> 00:16:04,624
(<i> tires squealing )</i>

406
00:16:09,462 --> 00:16:11,631
OH, HELGA, HOW ABOUT
PLAYING A GAME?

407
00:16:11,714 --> 00:16:14,342
(<i> sullenly ):
WHAT KIND OF A GAME?</i>

408
00:16:14,425 --> 00:16:16,636
OH, I KNOW!
THE LICENSE PLATE GAME.

409
00:16:16,719 --> 00:16:18,513
OR, OR YOU PICK A COLOR

410
00:16:18,596 --> 00:16:20,598
LIKE BLUE,
AND I PICK RED

411
00:16:20,682 --> 00:16:24,060
AND THEN WE SEE HOW MANY CARS
WITH THOSE COLORS DRIVE BY?

412
00:16:24,143 --> 00:16:28,064
OH... YOU USED TO LOVE THAT GAME
WHEN YOU WERE A LITTLE GIRL.

413
00:16:28,147 --> 00:16:28,731
THIS JUST IN, MOM.

414
00:16:28,815 --> 00:16:32,235
I'M NOT A LITTLE GIRL ANYMORE.

415
00:16:32,318 --> 00:16:34,320
YOU'RE STILL
MY LITTLE GIRL, HELGA.

416
00:16:34,404 --> 00:16:36,531
OH, CRIMINY.

417
00:16:36,614 --> 00:16:37,907
SO...

418
00:16:37,990 --> 00:16:41,536
DO YOU WANT TO PLAY
ONE OF THOSE GAMES?

419
00:16:41,619 --> 00:16:44,038
NO, MOM, I REALLY DON'T.

420
00:16:46,999 --> 00:16:50,837
Miriam:
DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT ROAD
WE'RE SUPPOSED TO TAKE NEXT?

421
00:16:50,920 --> 00:16:52,797
HOW ON EARTH
SHOULD I KNOW?

422
00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:54,632
YOU'RE THE ADULT
IN THIS CAR.

423
00:16:54,716 --> 00:16:56,259
I WROTE THE
DIRECTIONS ON

424
00:16:56,342 --> 00:16:58,094
THE BACK OF THAT
ENVELOPE THERE.

425
00:16:58,177 --> 00:16:58,469
(<i> tires squealing )</i>

426
00:16:58,553 --> 00:17:00,263
WATCH THE ROAD!

427
00:17:00,346 --> 00:17:00,555
OH!

428
00:17:00,638 --> 00:17:02,974
OH! OOPSY!

429
00:17:04,392 --> 00:17:06,644
GREAT, MOM. YOU
LOST THE DIRECTIONS.

430
00:17:06,728 --> 00:17:08,312
OH, WELL, THAT'S OKAY

431
00:17:08,396 --> 00:17:09,313
'CAUSE I HAVE A MAP.

432
00:17:09,397 --> 00:17:11,441
MOM, THIS IS A MAP

433
00:17:11,524 --> 00:17:12,400
OF WANKYLAND.

434
00:17:12,483 --> 00:17:15,737
GREAT. WE'RE TOTALLY LOST
ON THE ROAD TO NOWHERE

435
00:17:15,820 --> 00:17:17,530
WITH A MAP OF WANKYLAND.

436
00:17:17,613 --> 00:17:19,365
HAVE A LITTLE
FAITH IN ME, HELGA.

437
00:17:19,449 --> 00:17:20,616
(<i> horn blaring )</i>

438
00:17:20,700 --> 00:17:22,076
TRUCK!

439
00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:26,956
(<i> screaming... )</i>

440
00:17:27,039 --> 00:17:28,583
(<i> tires squealing )</i>

441
00:17:28,666 --> 00:17:30,042
(<i> crash )</i>

442
00:17:34,088 --> 00:17:35,256
(<i> moos )</i>

443
00:17:35,339 --> 00:17:35,965
(<i> screams )</i>

444
00:17:36,048 --> 00:17:39,469
LOOK, HELGA, A COW!

445
00:17:40,762 --> 00:17:43,097
WELL, NOW THAT'S FUNNY.

446
00:17:43,181 --> 00:17:44,891
I REMEMBER TAKING IT WITH ME

447
00:17:44,974 --> 00:17:46,058
WHEN WE LEFT THE WHEELER INN.

448
00:17:46,142 --> 00:17:50,104
MOM, PLEASE TELL ME
YOU DIDN'T LEAVE YOUR PURSE

449
00:17:50,188 --> 00:17:51,647
ON TOP OF THE CAR AGAIN.

450
00:17:51,731 --> 00:17:52,815
OH, DEAR, HELGA, I THINK THAT

451
00:17:52,899 --> 00:17:56,486
THAT IS EXACTLY
WHAT HAPPENED.

452
00:17:56,569 --> 00:17:58,988
Man:
<i>MM-HMM... SO</i>

453
00:17:59,071 --> 00:18:01,032
YOU DOESN'T HAVE
ANY MONEY, HMM?

454
00:18:01,115 --> 00:18:02,784
I'VE GOT $5.37.

455
00:18:02,867 --> 00:18:07,163
WELP, THIS HERE
FIX-IT JOB IS GOING

456
00:18:07,246 --> 00:18:10,374
TO SET YOU BACK $497.98,
MM-HMM.

457
00:18:10,458 --> 00:18:12,502
YOU COULD DETERMINE THAT
JUST FROM...

458
00:18:12,585 --> 00:18:13,127
MM-HMM.

459
00:18:13,211 --> 00:18:15,254
HELGA, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

460
00:18:15,338 --> 00:18:16,464
DON'T WORRY, HELGA

461
00:18:16,547 --> 00:18:18,382
EVERYTHING'S
GOING TO BE FINE.

462
00:18:18,466 --> 00:18:21,010
WELL, YOU'VE DONE
GREAT SO FAR, MIRIAM.

463
00:18:21,093 --> 00:18:21,844
YOU LOST THE MAP

464
00:18:21,928 --> 00:18:23,054
RAN US OFF THE ROAD

465
00:18:23,137 --> 00:18:24,806
LEFT YOUR PURSE
ON TOP OF THE CAR<i> AGAIN</i>

466
00:18:24,889 --> 00:18:27,558
AND WE'RE STUCK IN
THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE.

467
00:18:27,642 --> 00:18:29,560
I'M NINE YEARS OLD.

468
00:18:29,644 --> 00:18:30,353
YOU'RE THE PARENT.

469
00:18:30,436 --> 00:18:31,854
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO
TAKE CARE OF ME

470
00:18:31,938 --> 00:18:35,066
BUT YOU COULDN'T
EVEN DO THAT.

471
00:18:35,149 --> 00:18:37,527
FACE IT, MIRIAM,
YOU'RE A LOUSY MOM.

472
00:18:40,363 --> 00:18:41,489
LOOK, I'M STARVING.

473
00:18:41,572 --> 00:18:43,533
I'M GOING TO GET
A CHEESEBURGER.

474
00:18:43,616 --> 00:18:45,368
(<i> bell on door rings )</i>

475
00:18:47,245 --> 00:18:51,833
"MECHANICAL BULL RIDING CONTEST
SATURDAY NIGHT."

476
00:18:51,916 --> 00:18:53,543
(<i> gasps )</i>

477
00:18:53,626 --> 00:18:55,753
A CHEESEBURGER,
LARGE FRIES
AND A SHAKE.

478
00:18:55,837 --> 00:18:56,754
HELGA, LOOK.

479
00:18:56,838 --> 00:19:00,675
YOU? A MECHANICAL
BULL CONTEST?

480
00:19:00,758 --> 00:19:03,970
IT'S ONLY FIVE DOLLARS TO ENTER,
AND IF I WIN

481
00:19:04,053 --> 00:19:05,972
WE'LL GET ENOUGH MONEY
TO FIX THE CAR.

482
00:19:06,055 --> 00:19:07,723
I'M GETTING
A CHEESEBURGER.

483
00:19:07,807 --> 00:19:11,185
HELGA, I NEED
YOUR FIVE DOLLARS
FOR THE ENTRANCE FEE.

484
00:19:11,269 --> 00:19:12,395
HAVE A LITTLE FAITH.

485
00:19:12,478 --> 00:19:13,396
I, I COULD WIN.

486
00:19:13,479 --> 00:19:14,814
FINE, MIRIAM.

487
00:19:14,897 --> 00:19:17,108
YOU WANT TO BLOW
OUR LAST FIVE BUCKS SO

488
00:19:17,191 --> 00:19:19,652
YOU CAN ENTER
A MECHANICAL BULL CONTEST?

489
00:19:19,735 --> 00:19:22,113
GO AHEAD. YOU'VE MESSED
EVERYTHING ELSE UP.

490
00:19:22,196 --> 00:19:24,574
MIGHT AS WELL
MAKE IT A PERFECT TRIP.

491
00:19:24,657 --> 00:19:27,243
SIGN ME UP, PLEASE.

492
00:19:27,326 --> 00:19:29,370
(<i> whistling and applause )</i>

493
00:19:34,167 --> 00:19:37,962
CRIMINY. MOM'S GOING
TO RIDE THAT THING?

494
00:19:38,045 --> 00:19:39,630
SHE'LL KILL HERSELF.

495
00:19:39,714 --> 00:19:41,507
YOU THINK YOU'RE
GOING TO WIN

496
00:19:41,591 --> 00:19:43,384
THAT 500 BUCKS,
LITTLE LADY?

497
00:19:43,467 --> 00:19:44,635
WELL, I'M
GOING TO TRY.

498
00:19:44,719 --> 00:19:50,057
I GUESS YOU DON'T KNOW I'VE WON
THAT CONTEST FIVE YEARS RUNNING.

499
00:19:50,141 --> 00:19:50,725
WHAT DO YOU SAY
TO THAT?

500
00:19:50,808 --> 00:19:50,808
WHOA!

501
00:19:50,808 --> 00:19:53,644
(<i> laughter )</i>

502
00:19:53,728 --> 00:19:55,813
NOW LET'S GET
THIS CONTEST ROLLING.

503
00:19:55,897 --> 00:19:57,356
THE RULES ARE SIMPLE.

504
00:19:57,440 --> 00:19:58,399
I KEEP THE TIME.

505
00:19:58,482 --> 00:19:59,275
WHOEVER LASTS THE LONGEST

506
00:19:59,358 --> 00:20:02,570
WITHOUT GETTING THROWED
WINS THE CASH.

507
00:20:02,653 --> 00:20:03,946
BILL, YOU'RE UP FIRST.

508
00:20:04,030 --> 00:20:05,406
(<i> cheers and whistles )</i>

509
00:20:07,283 --> 00:20:08,743
(<i> loud clanking )</i>

510
00:20:08,826 --> 00:20:11,621
(<i> hooting and cheering )</i>

511
00:20:11,704 --> 00:20:12,997
(<i> crash )</i>

512
00:20:13,080 --> 00:20:13,956
THREE SECONDS.

513
00:20:14,040 --> 00:20:16,876
(<i> cheering and whistling )</i>

514
00:20:16,959 --> 00:20:17,585
(<i> thud )</i>

515
00:20:17,668 --> 00:20:19,670
(<i> laughter )</i>

516
00:20:25,009 --> 00:20:26,344
ALL RIGHT, SLIM

517
00:20:26,427 --> 00:20:27,303
YOU'RE UP.

518
00:20:27,386 --> 00:20:28,679
(<i> laughs heartily )</i>

519
00:20:31,557 --> 00:20:33,559
LET HER GO.

520
00:20:34,393 --> 00:20:36,646
(<i> clanking )</i>

521
00:20:36,729 --> 00:20:38,272
(<i> cheering throughout... )</i>

522
00:20:43,736 --> 00:20:46,864
FOUR MINUTES
AND 15 SECONDS.

523
00:20:46,948 --> 00:20:49,700
THAT'S THE BEST TIME SO FAR.

524
00:20:49,784 --> 00:20:51,077
ALL RIGHT, MIRIAM

525
00:20:51,160 --> 00:20:51,994
YOU'RE UP.

526
00:20:52,078 --> 00:20:54,789
(<i> jeering laughter )</i>

527
00:20:54,872 --> 00:20:57,875
I CAN'T EVEN WATCH THIS.

528
00:20:57,959 --> 00:20:59,210
Woman:
NO!

529
00:21:00,753 --> 00:21:04,215
YEE-HAW. YEE-HAW!

530
00:21:14,558 --> 00:21:16,102
(<i> chortling )</i>

531
00:21:21,774 --> 00:21:24,068
(<i> clanking )</i>

532
00:21:24,902 --> 00:21:29,532
(<i> laughter continues )</i>

533
00:21:29,615 --> 00:21:31,283
(<i> din audible outside )</i>

534
00:21:31,367 --> 00:21:32,368
Woman:
COME ON!

535
00:21:32,451 --> 00:21:35,579
I RECKON SHE'S NOT
TOO BAD, MM-HMM.

536
00:21:35,663 --> 00:21:37,456
STILL ON, ANYWAY.

537
00:21:37,540 --> 00:21:38,833
(<i> ruckus continues )</i>

538
00:21:54,390 --> 00:21:55,016
(<i> Miriam screaming )</i>

539
00:21:55,099 --> 00:21:56,434
MOM!

540
00:21:58,144 --> 00:21:58,728
MOM, ARE YOU OKAY?!

541
00:21:58,811 --> 00:22:01,230
THAT'S INVIGORATING.

542
00:22:01,313 --> 00:22:04,150
THE NEW
BULL RIDING CHAMPEEN

543
00:22:04,233 --> 00:22:06,986
AND WINNER OF 500 SMACKERS

544
00:22:07,069 --> 00:22:09,947
COWGIRL MIRIAM!

545
00:22:10,031 --> 00:22:13,534
(<i> cheering, whooping,
merry laughter )</i>

546
00:22:13,617 --> 00:22:16,245
Helga:
<i>BUT MOM, THAT WAS INCREDIBLE!</i>

547
00:22:16,328 --> 00:22:18,205
I STILL CAN'T
BELIEVE YOU WON.

548
00:22:18,289 --> 00:22:21,125
WELL, HELGA, I WAS
STATE BULL RIDING
CHAMPION

549
00:22:21,208 --> 00:22:22,376
WHEN I WAS A GIRL.

550
00:22:22,460 --> 00:22:24,295
YOU NEVER TOLD ME THAT.

551
00:22:24,378 --> 00:22:27,214
THERE'S A LOT I NEVER
TOLD YOU ABOUT MYSELF.

552
00:22:27,298 --> 00:22:30,051
WHAT ELSE DID YOU DO
WHEN YOU WERE A GIRL?

553
00:22:30,134 --> 00:22:32,511
THERE'S SO MUCH
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU.

554
00:22:32,595 --> 00:22:33,804
(<i> clears throat )</i>

555
00:22:33,888 --> 00:22:34,764
WELL, I GUESS
IT ALL STARTED

556
00:22:34,847 --> 00:22:35,931
WHEN I WAS NINE.

557
00:22:36,015 --> 00:22:38,434
I WANTED TO RIDE HORSES

558
00:22:38,517 --> 00:22:41,270
AND MY FATHER DIDN'T
THINK I COULD DO IT.

559
00:22:41,353 --> 00:22:44,231
HE SAID I'D GET HURT,
AND I SAID, "DADDY..."

560
00:22:44,315 --> 00:22:45,441
(<i> screams ):
TRUCK!</i>

561
00:22:45,524 --> 00:22:47,109
OH, DON'T WORRY,
I SEE IT.

562
00:22:47,193 --> 00:22:48,611
OH, MOM.

563
00:22:48,694 --> 00:22:51,989
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

564
00:22:52,073 --> 00:22:54,533
and NICKELODEON

565
00:22:54,617 --> 00:22:58,579
Captioned by
The Caption Center
WGBH Educational Foundation]

566
00:22:58,662 --> 00:22:59,205
♪ ...WE'LL COUNT THE MILES ♪

567
00:22:59,288 --> 00:23:01,123
♪<i> WE'LL COUNT THE MILES ♪</i>

568
00:23:01,207 --> 00:23:02,500
♪ IT TAKES AWHILE ♪

569
00:23:02,583 --> 00:23:03,876
♪<i> IT TAKES AWHILE ♪</i>

570
00:23:03,959 --> 00:23:08,130
♪ AND WE'LL SHARE THE SMILES
ALONG THE WAY ♪

571
00:23:08,214 --> 00:23:10,299
♪ 'CAUSE WE GOT TOMORROW ♪

572
00:23:10,382 --> 00:23:11,634
♪<i> WE GOT IT ♪</i>

573
00:23:11,717 --> 00:23:13,052
♪ WHO NEEDS YESTERDAY? ♪

574
00:23:13,135 --> 00:23:15,304
Miriam:
♪ HEY, HEY, HEY! ♪
COME ON, HELGA!

575
00:23:15,388 --> 00:23:19,266
♪ 'CAUSE, OH, TOMORROW'S
ALWAYS JUST A DAY AWAY ♪

576
00:23:19,350 --> 00:23:20,643
Miriam: YEAH!

577
00:23:20,726 --> 00:23:24,313
♪ OH, TOMORROW'S
ALWAYS JUST A DAY AWAY... ♪

578
00:23:24,396 --> 00:23:24,688
AND BIG FINISH!

579
00:23:24,772 --> 00:23:29,610
♪<i> AWAY! ♪</i>

580
00:23:29,693 --> 00:23:29,693
(<i> horn blaring )</i>

581
00:23:29,693 --> 00:23:31,487
Helga:
TRUCK!